Sunday, September 11, 2016

Excerpt # 4: Rising from the ashes of loss.

What's the point of living
Anger and depression
Overwhelmed with emotions, I pull to the side of the road and let it all out.  Man, It seems that all I can do is crying these days.  There never seems to be an end to these damn tears.  What kind of a whimp am I?  The pain, the pain, the freaking pain that bites into me like the closed jaws of a pitbull, when will I let it go?  Why can't I just run away and leave it all behind?  I want to escape so damn bad.  I so do not want this hogwash.  It is forced upon me and I resent every minute of it.   God, I hate you with a vengeance.  Louise is gone, gone forever.  You took her away from me.  Now I am nothing but a lost soul pouring its heart out in an empty car by the side of a lonely road.  I hurt so bad I just want to die.  It would be so easy to drive my car off of a cliff and end it all.  I guess it's a question of what hurts more, and right now living is insufferable.  It's so tempting, it could be so quick; finis with the unbearable pain and sadness; adios muchachos, see you in the next life; goodbye cruel world; I'm getting off.  But as attractive as offing myself is, I eventually give in to the last ounce of good sense left in me, take a couple of deep breaths and reluctantly pull my car back on the road and set out to face the day once more.
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Dr. Pierre Milot, Ph.D., Ph.D. (tc)
Therapeutic Counsellor - Author
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Info or free evaluation: 613.703.9237

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