A series of blog entries on loss / bereavement, stress / anger management, life transition counselling, couples relationships, health / nutrition, CBD - THC consultation, spirituality / metaphysics, . The blog is also about trying to understand 'Life' and its purpose through the ever evolving mind of a psychotherapist. Dr Milot, Ph.D. is the author of: 'Rising From The Ashes of Loss, My Voyage Through Grief'.
Monday, February 20, 2017
Rising From The Ashes of Loss, My Voyage Through Grief: excerpt # 23
Post-loss March, 2011
The dangers of unresolved grief: anger, resentment and rage
Readjusting and adapting to the new life
Reinforcing coping mechanisms
The gym was not very busy today very quiet and, aside from a few overzealous bodybuilders furiously pumping iron while exhibiting a sparkling set of bright white teeth in an uninviting grimace that says, go away and don’t bother me, there is nothing much else to see. Not even a good looking girl in sight as I would have expected. Zilch. Boring!
Let’s crawl back home slowly and hope I don’t get honked at too often by hurried drivers following me and pissed off at being slowed down by my 'I don’t give a crap' sorry ass slow driving. Between the sixty minutes it takes me to travel back and forth to the gym and my actual time in there, I manage to kill a miserable two hours and a half of my unending day. Wow, now what? But I shouldn’t ask as I know darn well what I need to do once I get back into my mind-numbing abode: tedious disconnecting exercises. Oh joy, what a blast! I always resist that phase of the program and although efficient, I find it difficult and draining emotionally. The sessions always bring me back into an underlying cesspool of repressed emotions, a world I’d rather forget, but cannot, must not. In fact facing these feelings is mandatory if I want to get over this. Making excuses to avoid my mental workout is not an option and I have to stick to my plan, regardless.
Back at home, once again as I open the kitchen door, I’m instantly assaulted by a powerful sense of emptiness and I start chocking again, "Damn it,” I say out loud in frustration. I have to do this, I don’t have a choice and hurriedly start making my way up the stairs to my meditation corner...